Nightline's Daily Line

Thank you for showing this segment on
OpenAdoption.I, too am an adoptee~would
very much like to know my heritage/health/family members~~ is Ohio an open adoptionstate?

Thanks for any feedback,
I like watching all the Niteline programs.

I think if the biological parent has made no effort, in later years, to pursue information about the child that it should not be simple to find ones biological parents.

I think that if the parents giving the child up want it to remain closed, then it should be. But I believe that medical records are sooooo important and the child should have them.

I am a birthmother that has been in touch with the child that I placed for adoption. I personally think that open records is the way to go. Although I am not currently in contact with my daughter, neither of us regrets making contact, and having our questions answered. I have been able to update medical information for her, and I found out that she has a wonderful family, like I was promised she would have. That took a load off of my heart to know she was happy in her family.

I feel that if the parent gave the child up for a good reason, like not being able to take care of the child, the if they wish then they could register for the child to find them. In turn, if the child wants to be found or is looking for their parents, then they too can find or be found. Like a Friend Finder site...

As the mother of two adopted children, I think adoption records should be open to allow adoptees to find their biological parents if they so desire.

Please encourage all states to make it easier for adult children to find birth families.
Thank you,
Veronica

I personally think that it should be easy for a person adopted out to be able to find thier parents. My mother was adopted out, And she has tried to find her natural mother, With no luck. I have a problem with blood clots, and so does my sister. A few of my neices do as well. It would be nice to know exactly what has been passed down from generation to generation. If not make it easy for them to find thier real parents, Then atleast for the medical part of it.

It seems to me that everyone should be afforded the basic human right to know their birth information. Probably, adoptees will want open records and the birth parents will not!
It wasn't the doing of the child to make these circumstances. It would be nice for the 'adults' to own up to the responsibility of the effects they caused.

I am an adoptee who searched and found her biological parents in 1967--long before it was fashionable or at all supported by society.

I support open record laws for all 50 states. My search was conducted in Florida which at the time had a law requiring my records be kept in "perpetuity" and allowing me to legally inherit from my biological parents.

I did in fact inherit $10,000 from my biological mother. I used it to get my Master's degree in Information Science.

My mother was a Phi Beta Kappa graduate of the University of Tennessee in the 1930's. I like to think I inherited her brains and her maverick ways.

Why should just the parents have a say in this? I think the children should have a right to the information just as the parents do.

I believe that everyone has a right to know who their parents are. If someone has the right to birth a baby, that baby, as an adult, has the right to know from whence she/he came -- if only to know medical information.

I believe, at the very least, adoptees should be given access to medical background and genetic information. As a grateful adoptee, I am appreciative of my life but resentful that I am not permitted to know anything about my bloodline. Much as the woman in your broadcast, I do not want to disrupt anyone's life, but knowing your heritage should not be dealt with this way. I am from Illinois where the records are still sealed.

i was adopted at 2 months, in 1958. i know exactly what this lady has been going through. i am in Texas. i am planning to petition the district court in Austin, TX to have my court records unsealed. at my age, 50, time is becoming a factor. my birth mom and birth dad may not be alive anymore. i only hope that i have natural siblings. i wish only success for her and i hope she gets to meet her unseen family. i think that in this day and age, the birth family would be forgiving and would accept her to their fold.
Kenneth Trochta El Campo, Texas

I feel their should be a way for the children to unite only if the birth mother and father registers for them to. If the birth mother and father doesnt then they should leave medical records of family history and gene samples ect.. for the child to have some sense of their past and present health risks etc..and every 10 years the birth parents should have to update their medical and maybe they might change their mind about meeting and know that they did the right thing for the child.

I've had a lot of personal experience with this topic. Some days I regret finding out who they were and other days I'm glad that I knew who they were. It's a very split emotion. I was very glad to find out their medical background so I would have some knowledge of what to expect in my elder years, but to find out how I got into the situation of adoption to begin with, was extremely difficult to process. I was glad to "meet" my siblings but was afraid that it would alienate my adopted siblings. I believe that adoptions are closed for a reason and that it should remain so unless the child petitions the courts.

Yes, I think records should be open.My son recently contacted me after 36 years and it was very painful at first, but I think the truth shall set you free.

At 43 Years old, I believed that I found my biological mother, sent her a letter (signature required, so I knew SHE got it) and hoped for, at least, a phone call. Well, I never heard a word and she soon deleted her profiles on places like Classmates.com, etc. I still believe to this day that I found her, and would love to confirm that through unsealing my records (California). But I also understand, just like in your program, that she may be afraid to let anyone else know. I would not want to bring that hurt upon her or her family. So, I guess, I see and understand both sides of the story.....I just wish it were easier to acertain and legislate that one side is more "just" than the other in their quest or secrecy.

Thank you for airing this segment. I am 40 years old and was adopted at birth. A few years ago I found my biological family and now have 5 siblings who I adore. They have not replaced the wonderful family I've always had, but have enhanced my life. I feel very strongly that I have a right to know my biological orgins and feel that the laws need to change. We all have a right to know this information.

I THINK EVERY PERSON HAS A RIGHT TO KNOW WERE THEY COME FROM.THERE ARE MANY RESONS PEOPLE DO THINGS RIGHT OR WRONG,BUT NOT BEING ALOUD TO KNOW WERE YOUR LIFE BEGAIN IS SAD.

hi i just watched your segment on adoptee serchin for their biological parents . i think all states should have it to where they can serch and find their parents and the same for the kids . 4 of my siblings were adopted d yrs ago and my mom hasnt been able to search for them due to she is old and in bad health she cant remember their dates of birth i am going to try to find out all info to search for her but all states should give them a chance at meeting the real parents

I sincerely hope other states follow suit! Adoptees have a right to know their medical history. This is probably one of the main reason most of them search.

Everyone should have the right to know the most basic information about their origins. The knowledge of your basic biological heritage should be the birthright of each individual. There should be up to date information about medical situations/ diseases. It is not enough to state the medical history of the mother at the time of relinquishment as she is most likely young and healthy and has little information about diseases.

I think ALL states should open the adoption records to any person who has been adopted. I am 62 yrs. old and never knew who my bio-father was. My Mother would not tell me, and went to elaborate means to keep me from following a trail. My step-father adopted me when I was a young teen ager, and my original records are sealed. I was born in CA. and the order of adoption and the sealing of my original birth certificate, is in MO. Who could it possibly hurt now? My mom and step dad are long dead, and my biological parent probably is too. In my entire life I've never felt like I belonged anyplace or to anyone. It trul-
y has made my life very difficult. I want to know who he was and where I came from, but at this point, I don't feel that will ever happen.
y

I always believed that adoptions should be confidential. Today, I changed my mind. After all, we are human beings, each one of us has a biological mother and a father. I think the child has an inherent right to know its parents. I applaud those who decided to give up their children as well as those parents who adopted children. I'm sure that each of the adoptees is glad they were born instead of being aborted, which happens a lot now (for every 33% babies that are born, the same number is aborted :( A child, if seeks such info, should have access to family health history and heritage.

Records should and MUST be opened!
I am a 57 year old adoptee born and adopted in NYS June, 1951. I was diagnosed with breast cancer at age 47. From the little information given to me by the adoption agency, Louise Wise, I know that my biological grandmother died at or around age 47 shortly after undergoing "a serious surgical procedure."  Did she die of breast cancer?  Did my mother also have breast cancer at some point in her life?  I will never know because there are no updated medical records available to me.  I have a 31 year old daughter and a 25 year old son who deserve to know if there have been THREE generations of breast cancer before them.  Additionally, I currently have other serious, undiagnosed illnesses, for which access to my medical history is of paramount importance, even life-saving.

I have utilized every available means that NYS law has to offer to try and locate my biological medical information.  My physician and I petitioned the surrogate court in Brooklyn, and were denied.  I tried to hire private investigators, which would have cost me thousands of dollars to obtain information, but due to the details of my adoption, no one wants to take my case.

Why am I not able to ensure the health of my family, the way all other citizens of this country can do? Why do we have to continue living with the unknown simply because we are adopted and are governed by antiquated laws that desperately need to be changed? Opening records is not about facilitating reunions--good or bad---its about giving adult adoptees the same rights every other citizen of this country has. Medical history is generally free to Americans, except for adoptees who under the current law must have a serious physical or mental illness and then have to pay a court appointed attorney $2000. This is outrageous and unfair. The health and well-being of adopted persons is totally disreguarded.

Adoptees have been called members of "a witness protection program we didn't ask to be in." When adopted, our birth certificate bearing our original names and parents, were sealed, our identities were wiped out and we were issued new certificates. Why is it a crime punishable by law, to falsify any other kind of US or State document, but it is OK to wipe out, falsify and forever seal a person's record of birth?

Records are not sealed at relinquishment, but later, at the time of adoption. This means that they aren't sealed to preserve the anonymity of the birth family but to erase the child's past (with all that the erasure implies), as well as to protect the adoptive family from intrusion.

In addition, belief in the myth that mothers who have relinquished their children do not want to meet them has made the United States a virtual dinosaur, regarding granting adoptees their records. Germany, England, Scotland, Wales, Belgium, Holland, Sweden, Norway, Denmark, Iceland, and Finland allow adoptees access to their original birth certificates. So do Australia, New Zealand, Israel, Taiwan, China, Japan, Korea, and provinces of Canada. Ours is almost the only industrialized country that denies adopted adults knowledge of who they are.

Closed records laws are an outrageous violation of the Constitution in that they deprive a class of people (adoptees) of a basic civil right available to every other citizen who is not a member of this class -- that is, the opportunity to go to the vital records department of the state in which they were born, pay the required fee and receive a copy of their birth certificate. It is unfathomable to me and millions of people in this country how these archaic and unfair laws have remained on the books for so long. Clearly, they were enacted at a time when society believed, first and foremost, that it needed to protect adoptive families from the intrusion of birth families and, second, to protect adoptees from the stigma of learning they were "illegitimate."

The only way to truly restore the rights of adult adoptees to their birthright and current medical histories as well as their true identity, is to pass legislation which give them the same right as every other American citizen.

Is there any truth to the many myths that have been propagated regarding open records?  No legitimate promise of anonymity was ever made at any time to any birth parent, and no written evidence of such promises exists. Both the TN and OR State Supreme Courts have ruled that birth parents were not promised perpetual confidentiality.

The abortion/adoption connection is completely mythical. In states with open records, the abortion rate is consistently LOWER than in states where records remain closed to adopted persons. Also, conversely, states with open records typically have HIGHER adoption rates than closed states.

Has there been an increase in divorce rates for women who never told their husbands? There have been no verified reports of divorces caused by adoptee reunions.

And mothers who have made it clear that they don't want to meet their child, have NOT been harassed. Adoptees do not stalk parents who do not want contact. Adoptees are not looking for new parents. They also are not insensitive. Adoptees would NOT go barging into their biological parents lives. They have dealt with feelings of rejection their entire lives, they certainly would not do anything to cause an even deeper feeling of rejection firsthand.

Research such as the Evan B. Donaldson report, has shown that no adopted person in any state with open records has caused harm to any birth parent.  I am not a criminal and should NOT be treated as one just because I want to have the same RIGHTS as every NON-adopted person. They have the right to have access to the document which shows their true birth. I should also have that right.

Plus, as Adam Pertman, director of the Adoption Institute, recently said. "IF people are fearful of an adoptee who might harass a reluctant birth mother, there ARE restraining orders. But to put a restraining order against an ENTIRE CLASS of people is unfair!!"

A recent study has been published entitled, "The Only Americans Legally Prohibited From Knowing Who Their Birth Parents Are: A Rejection of Privacy Rights as a Bar to Adult Adoptees' Access to Original Birth and Adoption Record." This study reviews the reasons that some courts have upheld the statutory bars to adult adoptee access to birth and adoption records and the legal foundations for supporting access. This 33-page article, published in the Cleveland State Law Review (Volume 55, Issue 3), explores the concept of constitutional privacy and the categories of privacy currently recognized in American law, concluding that birthparent privacy interests are an insufficient basis for blocking adoptee access. It also reviews some recent judicial and legislative approaches supporting this conclusion.

In addition, research has shown that the number of birth mothers not wanting contact is tiny. Most welcome, and long for contact. However, those who do not want contact are better served by open records. States that granted adoptees access to their original birth certificates have built in vehicles enabling birth parents to let their children know if and how they want to meet. No violations have been reported.

In states with closed records, parents who prefer no contact have no means to make their wishes known. And though it may be hard in states with closed records to find family, it is still being done, resulting in unplanned and possible devastating results.  The NYS adoption reform bill delineates a "contact preference" whereby birth mothers can clearly state whether or not they want contact. And if 'no contact' is desired, this will be upheld and they would, at the least, supply updated medical information to the adoptee.

Adoptees do not "search" just out of idle curiosity. Adoptees are in dire need of accurate, complete, and updated medical and genetic information. Lives are depending on it.  Lives versus privacy; in my mind, there is just no comparison. We as adoptees do not have a right to reunion; we DO have a right to our own records.

I feel we all have a moral obligation to look at historical judgments and correct them if they were made in violation of personal rights. The practice of sealed records in adoptions denies the adopted person their birth rights. They have the right to know who their biological parents were, the right to know what their racial and ethnic background was and the right to know about their family medical history. Depriving a human being of life-saving medical information is not only unconstitutional, but it is immoral and unconscionable. Why do I have to cry myself to sleep whenever I think of how helpless I feel by not being able to secure my own health or the health of my family the way most parents are able to do. LAWS NEED TO BE CHANGED!

Records should and MUST be opened!
I am a 57 year old adoptee born and adopted in NYS June, 1951. I was diagnosed with breast cancer at age 47. From the little information given to me by the adoption agency, Louise Wise, I know that my biological grandmother died at or around age 47 shortly after undergoing "a serious surgical procedure."  Did she die of breast cancer?  Did my mother also have breast cancer at some point in her life?  I will never know because there are no updated medical records available to me.  I have a 31 year old daughter and a 25 year old son who deserve to know if there have been THREE generations of breast cancer before them.  Additionally, I currently have other serious, undiagnosed illnesses, for which access to my medical history is of paramount importance, even life-saving.

I have utilized every available means that NYS law has to offer to try and locate my biological medical information.  My physician and I petitioned the surrogate court in Brooklyn, and were denied.  I tried to hire private investigators, which would have cost me thousands of dollars to obtain information, but due to the details of my adoption, no one wants to take my case.

Why am I not able to ensure the health of my family, the way all other citizens of this country can do? Why do we have to continue living with the unknown simply because we are adopted and are governed by antiquated laws that desperately need to be changed? Opening records is not about facilitating reunions--good or bad---its about giving adult adoptees the same rights every other citizen of this country has. Medical history is generally free to Americans, except for adoptees who under the current law must have a serious physical or mental illness and then have to pay a court appointed attorney $2000. This is outrageous and unfair. The health and well-being of adopted persons is totally disreguarded.

Adoptees have been called members of "a witness protection program we didn't ask to be in." When adopted, our birth certificate bearing our original names and parents, were sealed, our identities were wiped out and we were issued new certificates. Why is it a crime punishable by law, to falsify any other kind of US or State document, but it is OK to wipe out, falsify and forever seal a person's record of birth?

Records are not sealed at relinquishment, but later, at the time of adoption. This means that they aren't sealed to preserve the anonymity of the birth family but to erase the child's past (with all that the erasure implies), as well as to protect the adoptive family from intrusion.

In addition, belief in the myth that mothers who have relinquished their children do not want to meet them has made the United States a virtual dinosaur, regarding granting adoptees their records. Germany, England, Scotland, Wales, Belgium, Holland, Sweden, Norway, Denmark, Iceland, and Finland allow adoptees access to their original birth certificates. So do Australia, New Zealand, Israel, Taiwan, China, Japan, Korea, and provinces of Canada. Ours is almost the only industrialized country that denies adopted adults knowledge of who they are.

Closed records laws are an outrageous violation of the Constitution in that they deprive a class of people (adoptees) of a basic civil right available to every other citizen who is not a member of this class -- that is, the opportunity to go to the vital records department of the state in which they were born, pay the required fee and receive a copy of their birth certificate. It is unfathomable to me and millions of people in this country how these archaic and unfair laws have remained on the books for so long. Clearly, they were enacted at a time when society believed, first and foremost, that it needed to protect adoptive families from the intrusion of birth families and, second, to protect adoptees from the stigma of learning they were "illegitimate."

The only way to truly restore the rights of adult adoptees to their birthright and current medical histories as well as their true identity, is to pass legislation which give them the same right as every other American citizen.

Is there any truth to the many myths that have been propagated regarding open records?  No legitimate promise of anonymity was ever made at any time to any birth parent, and no written evidence of such promises exists. Both the TN and OR State Supreme Courts have ruled that birth parents were not promised perpetual confidentiality.

The abortion/adoption connection is completely mythical. In states with open records, the abortion rate is consistently LOWER than in states where records remain closed to adopted persons. Also, conversely, states with open records typically have HIGHER adoption rates than closed states.

Has there been an increase in divorce rates for women who never told their husbands? There have been no verified reports of divorces caused by adoptee reunions.

And mothers who have made it clear that they don't want to meet their child, have NOT been harassed. Adoptees do not stalk parents who do not want contact. Adoptees are not looking for new parents. They also are not insensitive. Adoptees would NOT go barging into their biological parents lives. They have dealt with feelings of rejection their entire lives, they certainly would not do anything to cause an even deeper feeling of rejection firsthand.

Research such as the Evan B. Donaldson report, has shown that no adopted person in any state with open records has caused harm to any birth parent.  I am not a criminal and should NOT be treated as one just because I want to have the same RIGHTS as every NON-adopted person. They have the right to have access to the document which shows their true birth. I should also have that right.

Plus, as Adam Pertman, director of the Adoption Institute, recently said. "IF people are fearful of an adoptee who might harass a reluctant birth mother, there ARE restraining orders. But to put a restraining order against an ENTIRE CLASS of people is unfair!!"

A recent study has been published entitled, "The Only Americans Legally Prohibited From Knowing Who Their Birth Parents Are: A Rejection of Privacy Rights as a Bar to Adult Adoptees' Access to Original Birth and Adoption Record." This study reviews the reasons that some courts have upheld the statutory bars to adult adoptee access to birth and adoption records and the legal foundations for supporting access. This 33-page article, published in the Cleveland State Law Review (Volume 55, Issue 3), explores the concept of constitutional privacy and the categories of privacy currently recognized in American law, concluding that birthparent privacy interests are an insufficient basis for blocking adoptee access. It also reviews some recent judicial and legislative approaches supporting this conclusion.

In addition, research has shown that the number of birth mothers not wanting contact is tiny. Most welcome, and long for contact. However, those who do not want contact are better served by open records. States that granted adoptees access to their original birth certificates have built in vehicles enabling birth parents to let their children know if and how they want to meet. No violations have been reported.

In states with closed records, parents who prefer no contact have no means to make their wishes known. And though it may be hard in states with closed records to find family, it is still being done, resulting in unplanned and possible devastating results.  The NYS adoption reform bill delineates a "contact preference" whereby birth mothers can clearly state whether or not they want contact. And if 'no contact' is desired, this will be upheld and they would, at the least, supply updated medical information to the adoptee.

Adoptees do not "search" just out of idle curiosity. Adoptees are in dire need of accurate, complete, and updated medical and genetic information. Lives are depending on it.  Lives versus privacy; in my mind, there is just no comparison. We as adoptees do not have a right to reunion; we DO have a right to our own records.

I feel we all have a moral obligation to look at historical judgments and correct them if they were made in violation of personal rights. The practice of sealed records in adoptions denies the adopted person their birth rights. They have the right to know who their biological parents were, the right to know what their racial and ethnic background was and the right to know about their family medical history. Depriving a human being of life-saving medical information is not only unconstitutional, but it is immoral and unconscionable. Why do I have to cry myself to sleep whenever I think of how helpless I feel by not being able to secure my own health or the health of my family the way most parents are able to do. LAWS NEED TO BE CHANGED!

It was obvious that the birth mother did not want to be contacted over the phone and was not emotionally able to comprehend it. Should Cynthia have cared more than her "instant gratification" and disregarded the advice to write and not call, she may have had a chance at a relationship. She had to apologize several times because she realized that it was a mistake to call.
If all adoptions were open, then what would be the point? Or what would the point of foster care be? Would they just automatically be adopted out because all information is public?

I found my son who I gave up for adoption and we have been in touch with each other. We get together once in awhile. My family met him also

I think it should be based on the logical parent dection if they wont contact of there son or daughter.

Yes, it's time to open records and allow the children of adoption to know their history, genetical and medical. We've been hidden under a cloak of shame by those who came before us; allow us to stand in the light and say I know who my parents are, biological and adoptive. Whether we seek contact or not with our biological parents at least give us the god-given right to know what every other non-adopted child is given, the names of their biological mother and father.

I was born in 1954 and to this day I have longed to know my mother's face. Did my father have squinty eyes? Why do I love music?
A registry should be set up where birth parents can check to see if their child has inquired about them. Can you imagine those email conversations? What a glorious day for thousands that would be!

I am the mother of 2 adopted children. I have a lot of information about the birthparents, including medical information. I think that this information is usually or always given now. I do think that the doors should be kept open, but both parties should be in agreement. It is not fair to force a private birthmother to now do something that she was promised that she would never have to do. Please let's respect everyone's feelings: the birthparents and the adoptive children. My son never thinks about it, but my daughter would like to meet her birthmother but her birthmother does not want to meet her at this time (I am in contact with the birthgrandmother.) My daughter understands and respects those wishes. She also knows that once that door is opened it cannot be closed and one person will always want more or less than the other person, which means that they will forever be a little or a lot uncomfortable.

I alsio think that they been into separate way's for to long and alsio where was the parent when he or she graudated or got married or went to his or her play's

Having been involved on both ends, I feel that records should not be sealed. Each of us have the right to say no if approached. But, life has many challenges and having closure to issues can be very freeing, even tho painful for a season. There are places in the heart that remain, even if they are never exposed. Outcomes are not always ideal, but neither are some beginnings. Each individual must remain true to their own heart, and not be left with the "if only" thoughts.

Having been involved on both ends, I feel that records should not be sealed. Each of us have the right to say no if approached. But, life has many challenges and having closure to issues can be very freeing, even tho painful for a season. There are places in the heart that remain, even if they are never exposed. Outcomes are not always ideal, but neither are some beginnings. Each individual must remain true to their own heart, and not be left with the "if only" thoughts.

As an adoptee from 1960 when birth records were closed, I feel very strongly that these records should be open to adoptee children once they are 18. We all deserve to know where we came from and our medical history. It is very difficult to go to the doctor year after year and report "no history" on all medical issues. And, as an adoptee, as we have children, we should know what medical issues we may pass on to our children. I was lucky enough to find my birth mother's family through a search. Unfortunately, my birth mother was deceased and as far as we know she never revealed to anyone who the biological father was. I would give anything to find the man who fathered me, but it looks as though that information was buried along with my birth mother. I urge all states to open up their records for adoptees. We have the right to know our history.

I was adopted at birth into a multi-cultural family with parents the same age as my biological grandparents. I began my search at age 18. I am now 21 and my anniversary of meeting my biological mother in person is coming up this September 8th. It was easy for me to connect with my biological family because my bio-grandparents's doctor is related to my adoptive family. When I called my uncle and got their number, I called and spoke with my bio-grand parents and I obtained their address however they would not give me information of my mother. In fact, they never told her I was trying to contact her. A year later, my adoptive mother and I hired an investigator, I gave her the address I had obtained, and it took her a few days to trace down my biological mother who, ironically, lives in a military town an hour north of where I have family in North Carolina. I vacationed for 10 years at a beach town in south eastern North Carolina. I had met some US Marines who were stationed at Camp Lejeune which is where my mother and my four younger half siblings live. After writing her a letter, she got up the courage to call me and we spoke for 8 hours where, in an instant, my siblings found out they had an older sister. I now live 30 minutes from them and attend school in the same town. We all have a great relationship!

So, for me, it was easy to connect with her. However, I believe it is much too hard for some people to find their biological family. I think information should be required from the biological mother AT THE LEAST so when the child is of age, they can go to the court house or wherever and find maybe a note from the mother to the child with her information OR a note saying that "this is your medical information, but my family does not know about you and I want to keep it that way. I Love you but we have all moved on" or something of that nature. I just wish it was easier for my adoptive friends to have their medical information at their disposal. I think it should be required to give medical information to the adoptive family because, that at the least, is the most important. It is selfish and unfair to have a terrible medical condition and not give any kind of upper hand. As an adopted child, we deserve to know our medical/family history... we deserve to know if we have siblings... and if our parents drank or did some kind of drug(s) during time the baby was conceived or during the pregnancy. We simply deserve to know! More importantly, our future children deserve to know!

I could speak a lot more on the adoption topic, but it wouldn't be exactly on this subject. I did my senior project on adoption so I've done a lot of research and what not. Thank you for doing a story like this. It really hit home for me....

I have a few friends who were adopted as infants, & I've seen the positive & negative affects of being "given up." I feel that the adopted individual didn't have any say-so in their situation, as the parent(s) did. I STRONGLY support adoption & oppose abortion if one of the two choices are the "only" options the mother has. One thing, though, how the child turns out doesn't necessarily affect the parent, yet the medical history and genetics of the biological parents greatly impact the adoptee and other generations who follow. Not to mention, I believe we as human beings deserve the right to know where we came from and why we look the way we do. What one "gives away" may not matter to them, and that's their call. But it's normal for one to want to know where he/she came from. It's a question we ask as very young children. And when we are old enough to know and rationalize, we should have the access to the truth of that inquiry.

In reading some of he posts I noticed that many of the people posting have referred to the biological parents as the "real" parents. The "real" parents are the ones that raised the children! The "biological parents" gave them the opportunity to be "real" parents. I am the mother of 2 children who were adopted and I pray I get to meet their biological parents someday so that I may thank them for giving me the greatest gift I've ever been given! To my children's birthparents: Thank you! You've always been portrayed in a very positive way. I would welcome your meeting these very special children.

This is a double-edged sword. While I do believe people have a right to their privacy, as an adoptee, I have a right to know the answers to my questions, even if it doesn't result in meeting my birth parents. I am beginning a search and have no medical history yet. My nephew is an international adoptee and knows more about his medical and cultural history than I do about mine. I only know my date of birth and the town I'm from - I don't even know what time of day I was born. I am in favor of using an intermediary source to filter out identifying info and/or bridge the gap between birth families and adoptees, should they all be open to it.

This is for sure a tough one. I too can see both sides, you don't want to ruin her life but need your health ?'s and so forth answered. Not all are respectful enough to respect the mothers privacy or care and I think the laws are in place to protect both parties. Its a tough call since there is no way to allow questions to be answered without also allowing those bad seeds in who would wrecklessly ruin the life of the biological mother without regards. Adoption is a tough choice and I think she has enough to deal with just having it on her heart. the one for the child though is the health issues, of course you have questions and such on other issues but I think it can be too dangerous not knowing where you come from, medical issues and so forth. God bless all involved on either side!

Most definitely birth records should NOT remain sealed. Value of life information must be available to all adoptee's. Our Adoption system is long overdue for opening records. This is a basic human right, and honor of human life.

I 'gave up' a baby for adoption a long, long time ago. The reasons are many, and mainly irrelevant here anyway. Point is, I did so because I genuinely believed at the time I was doing the best possible thing for the baby... A view I have not changed, nor regretted, some 34 or so years later. It was ALWAYS all about what was best for the baby! Still is. That was the only gift I had to offer at the time, a chance for a decent life. A chance. I hope that turned out to be the case.
I would, however, if asked, provide medical info, there being significant medical events in my own life, and family past. The 'child' does, in my humble opinion, have a 'right',moral or legal, I can't say, but in some way, a right, to know what to watch out for. I 'owe' this much. And I would provide it, if I only knew how. Where I live, and where the adoption took place, records remain sealed, so far as I know. (Ia and Ill) I have signed up, once, on a web listing to connect adopted children and biological parents, but nothing ever came of it. As the 'father', I understand that normally, it is the 'mother' that gets hunted down, NOT the 'father'. That's OK with me... It's not about my personal feelings. It's not a 'contest' to see who, the 'mother' or 'father' is more important to this 'child'. It's all about the info that is missing from this now adult person's medical records. Anything beyond this that this 'child' may want to know would be his to ask, not mine to volunteer.
I would support new laws which make it easier to connect this info with those who have it with those who need it. I understand why many would prefer to remain unknown. Future adoptions should, if they don't already, have the biological parents fill out a form with as much medical info as possible at the time. Problem with this is: One: Often, one 'parent' may not even know about it, (the 'father') and two: much medical stuff may not show up until many years or even decades later on. In my own case, I am now 100% disabled with MS. This is something an adopted child ought to know about. I also got my life straightened out, got married, and had kids. Half sisters to this child of so long ago. Does he have any 'right' to know about them? Does he even want to know this? I don't have answers. My young daughters DO know that there is the possibility of a half brother out there somewhere. (There was, and remains, reasonable doubt as to the actual parentage. Nonetheless, I got the 'credit' for the child, mine or not. I didn't duck it, I accepted it, and I pushed for adoption, knowing that at the time, it was the best thing I had to offer. I didn't know if I was going to be spending a lot of time in prision back then... It was a very real possibility then. I didn't, and eventually got my life back on track. And, except for being sick, my life now is pretty much what I would have hoped for. It just all came too late for that child. Wrong time, wrong place, wrong mother. I am not looking for a relationship with this child... if he is even mine... I don't have that right, I gave it up when I gave him up. And I'm OK with that. Mostly. (I do sometimes wonder, how it all worked out for him, and if he even wonders about who I am)
So, to summarize, I would welcome somewhat more open laws... but not necessarily too much more open. It should be possible, (More openness, that is) based upon the wants and needs of each individual situation, and medical info SHOULD be able to be made available, and update-able.
Sincerely:
Chris Mills
Iowa

I believe that all parents putting their children up for adoption must be required to give their families' known medical history, for the benefit of their children's health. Other than that, I think it should be optional if the parents want to be found of their children later in life.

AS A WOMAN WHO GAVE UP A CHILD FOR ADOPTION I THINK THAT IT SHOULD BE EASIER TO FIND THE BIRTH PARENTS. MY SON AND I SEARCHED FOR EACH OTHER FOR YEARS AND FINNALLY FOUND EACH OTHER BY LUCK ABOUT A YEAR AND A HALF AGO I ONLY WISH IT COULD HAVE BEEN SOONER.

I greatly appreciate tonight's coverage of the open/closed adoption issue. As the biolgical mother of a son, whom I placed through a well-researched home society in 1966, I am now, more than ever, eager to have contact with my son. I am fairly certain that adoption records in that state are sealed; yet I will now initiate an avenue of contact should he desire it. I've prayed for him daily since his birth and pray to meet him one day. Thanks for your good presentation.

I was adopted 54 years ago. I never searched for my biological mother for the same reasons the woman in your program didn't. I didn't want to cause pain to my adopted parents or my biological parents. But my heart aches to know my history and my biological family. My wish for all adopted children and their biological parents is that there would be a way, when the child becomes an adult, to be able to make a connection if desired. There should be a way for the agency that handled the adoption (or some other agency) to be able to contact the parent or child to inquire if there was an interest in meeting. I bet my biological mother would like to know that I grew up well, have been married for 33 years, and have two successful children and a precious grandchild!

I was born July 13, 1978 in Omaha, NE - only to be adopted a few days later. I do not know my biological mother or father, and would love to find out at least medical info. I beleive Nebraska is a sealed state, as I have been told that I could only go through the adoption agency. To do this process is a mighty fee and could take up to at least 6 monthes and they charge by the hour of searching. Being a mother of 5, my youngest twins, we don't have that kind of money to throw at something that could turn up nothing. You have to pay regardless if they bind them or not. All states should be open - yeah it might be an inconvience for the biological parents, but you can never cut all ties with a child - even if you don't want anything to do with them. They at least owe the child a medical background. If states are going to keep adoptions sealed then I believe they should give medical backgrounds to the adoptees family at birth and update evey 5 years - that would only be fair to the adoptee and what they do with the rest of their life.

Promises of confidentuality were made to birth mothers when they chose to give up their children. Promises were also made to families who chose to adopt those kids. While a decision to open records now would seem to be a monumental betrayal to both parties, the decision should be made by the person to whom no promises were made, the only person who had no choice, the adoptee. It is way past time for us to have a voice.

I live in Mn and they have recently passed legislation that allows adoptees access to their original birth certificates once they become adults. I feel that all adoptees should have those same rights regardless of where you were born or adopted. I am trying to find a biological sibling who was born in NY in 1955 and adopted in 1957. Unless you have the money to pay fees such as those Pam Slaton charges ($2000-2500), you just continue searching for years, as I have. This story made finding Cynthia G's birthmother so easy. If it is that quick and easy, why does it have to cost so much? I feel that adoptees are being taken advantage of because of the laws in some states. I am also wondering about Cynthia McFadden and if she has a relationship or knowledge of her birth family.

Yes I do feel records should not be sealed once a person is over 18 yrs. old. Iam 58 and have found out non identifing information. But I also just learned I have two 1/2 brothers we have the same mother. It's kind of unsetteling not to know your true heritage and almost like a torture to have this withheld. I espically want to know for my own children and be able to give them some background history. If we can get the City of NY to unseal records that would be a dream come true. I to had cancer with no family medical history to look back upon I feel it made it more difficult.To anyone who is interesed records from Louise
Wise service are now with Spence Chapin in NYC I was given a bit more informationfrom them than Louise Wise.

I too was adopted @ birth. Now in my middle 60s, it's too late to find my biological family. I did try back in the 70s, but could only register my name, if my biological family made an inquiry they could contact me. Nothing ever happened. My adopted family were wonderful, but there's always that empty feeling - you belong - but you don't. The records should be opened. Only an adoptee knows what it's like to have to write 'biological background unknown' accross every medical question ever asked.

I am 70yrs old and was adopted in Iowa in 1937,my daughter is 40 yrs old and was adopted in Tulsa Ok in 1966.
we both would like to have records opened so we can know about our birth parents, Maria says I would just like to find someone who looks like me. I was told a 'story" about my parents incleding that they both died at an early age My four biological sons would also like to know about their bio grandparents Obviously my parents would have passed by now but Maria would love to have information about her parents. I would be so happy just to satisfy my curiosity and know something about my health history.If Oklahoma and Iowa made those records available we would both be so happy.

I am 70yrs old and was adopted in Iowa in 1937,my daughter is 40 yrs old and was adopted in Tulsa Ok in 1966.
we both would like to have records opened so we can know about our birth parents, Maria says I would just like to find someone who looks like me. I was told a 'story" about my parents incleding that they both died at an early age My four biological sons would also like to know about their bio grandparents Obviously my parents would have passed by now but Maria would love to have information about her parents. I would be so happy just to satisfy my curiosity and know something about my health history.If Oklahoma and Iowa made those records available we would both be so happy.

To all the birthparents out there who would like to leave medical information for your biological children, please contact the adopton agency that handled the child's adoption and give them any medical information you have available. Some of the agencies will contact the adopted parents or have this information available if the birth children inquire about non-identifying information. Thank you!

As an adoptee reunited with her birthfamily, I'm in favor of opening adoption records to adoptees over the age of 18.
I found 3 half-brothers, two that I keep in contact with and one who I was fortunate to talk with before he passed away.
My boyfriend was adopted and after I found my birthfamily, he decided to search for his. When first contacted, his birthmother did not want contact, but after a few months, she agreed to see him.
Their relationship has grown stronger over the last couple of years and they are both really glad to be 'found'.
Please open adoption records in all states.

The adoptees I know not only need medical information but some closure for their feelings of rejection. I also know adoptees who were so totally mismatched with their adopted parents it was a nightmare for all concerned. Adoptees and the parents who adopt them need to know all they can so they can be successful families. I have been a foster parent for over 40 years and one of my hardest lessons was YOU CAN'T CHANGE GENETICS ANY MORE THAN YOU CAN MAKE THE CHILDREN GROW HORNS. I was luckier with my adopted daughter as I raised her mother and knew her sperm donor for 2 years before he disappeared. She was a nightmare in her teens but as I knew alcoholism ran in both sides of her biologic family I knew I had to try to arm her against the same fate. Knowledge may sometime be painful, but it beats the alternative.

We all should have the right to know our origins, medical information, and social circumstances. The stigma that necessitated confidentiality no longer exists. I have been on both ends of ths issue and believe that adoptees should be entitled to having this information if they wish it, for many reasons. No power on earth would ever change my mind on this one, having seen the suffering that results from closed records.

I am an adoptee that has searched for my birth parents x 35 years. I have never found them. I should be able to have open records to know all information available. Adoption is a $4.1 billion industry. As long as its controlled by secrecy which protects the flow of money, there will be very few open records. Open records is a right....

JL: Thanks for your post. I agree!

Needing Medical history is very important for both sides of adoption. I had brain surgery three years ago and Doctor said it is highly possible all sibling will have this problem. Can't find any links to inform them.

I hope that tonight's program will foster more discussion in the media and in society about the closed adoption records issue. We need to hear the unadulterated opinions of many birth parents, adoptees, and adoptive parents. Without their voices, it is impossible to determine who benefits and who is harmed by keeping records closed. [Here's a clue: the birth mothers had to pay for their stay at a maternity home and/or their hospital bill. Then the adoptive parents had to pay those same expenses to adopt the same baby. Additionally, these organizations received large donations from individuals and civic groups to support their noble cause. Now these same organizations are charging the adoptees hundreds of dollars for their non-identifying and identifying information.] No wonder CHS and other large agencies oppose opening the closed records... they cannot make money off of it.

I AM 59 YEAR'S OLD,AMD HAVE BEEN ADOPTED.I FEEL I HAVE THE RIGHT TO KNOW MY BIOLOGICAL PARENTS.BUT HAVE NOT BEEN ABLE TO RECEIVE THAT INFORMATION. DUE TO LAW'S THAT PROTECT THE PARENT'S, WHAT ABOUT THE CHILDS RIGHT'S HERE. COME ON I ALSO HAVE A BROTHER THAT I CAN NOT LOCATE. ADOPTEE'S GO THREW HELL TO FIND OUT THE TRUTH OF THEIR LIFE.NOW WHO DO WE HURT THE MOST, THE PARENT OR THE CHILDREN? I HAVE LONGED TO KNOW MY PARENT'S AND FAMILY.I WAS BORN IN NEW YORK STATE (SYRACUSE).ALL OTHER FAMILY MEMBERS KNOW THE TRUTH BUT NOT MYSELF OR MY BROTHER.I KNOW I WAS AND I KNOW HE KNOW'S HE WAS ADOPTED.BUT WE CAN'T BE GIVEN THE TRUTH.OUR RECORDS ARE SEALED. WE ARE OLD ENOUGH.BY NOW AS ADULT'S WE ARE OLD ENOUGH!!!TO KNOW.SO WE CAN BUT A CLOSURE,TO WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO US.AND MEET ONE ANOTHER,AND BE HAPPY NOW. THE PARENTS THAT GAVE US UP, HAVE BEEN HAPPY ALL THESE YEARS. BUT WE HAVE NOT,!!DON"YOU THINK WE SHOUD BE HAPPY, BE FOR WE DIE OF A BROKEN HEART,BECAUSE WE DID NOT MATTER AT ALL IN THIS CASE.HOW CRUEL CAN YOU GET.AND YOU ALL THINK YOUR PROCTECING US.YOUR ONLY TAKING AWAY OUR LIFE AND RIGHT'S AND THEN WHERE LEFT TO DIE...OUR LAW'S SUCK. AND THAT IS THE TRUTH.YOU WANT TO DO US JUSTICE,CHANGE THE LAW'S OPEN THE RECORDS. THINK OF THE CHILD FOR ONCE,DUE JUSTICE TO US.WRERE JUSTICE SHOOD BE DONE. WE ARE NOW IN THE YEAR OF 2008 NOT BACK IN THE 40'S THE LAW NEED'S CHANGING. IT IS TO OLD FOR OUR CENTURY NOW.WHERE ANY THING GOES IN 2008.THOSE BABY'S BE COME ADULT'S, AS AN ADULT, I WANT TRUTH NOT LIE'S .MY PARENT'S ARE PROBELLY DECEASED.DON'T LET MY BROTHER, DIE PLEASE CHANGE.THE LAW'S FOR US...THE ADOPTEES WE HAVE FEELING'S AND HEART'S ALSO.WE ARE ALIVE STILL!!!!!! IN SYRACUSE N.Y. THANK YOU ALL.

I AM 59 YEAR'S OLD,AMD HAVE BEEN ADOPTED.I FEEL I HAVE THE RIGHT TO KNOW MY BIOLOGICAL PARENTS.BUT HAVE NOT BEEN ABLE TO RECEIVE THAT INFORMATION. DUE TO LAW'S THAT PROTECT THE PARENT'S, WHAT ABOUT THE CHILDS RIGHT'S HERE. COME ON I ALSO HAVE A BROTHER THAT I CAN NOT LOCATE. ADOPTEE'S GO THREW HELL TO FIND OUT THE TRUTH OF THEIR LIFE.NOW WHO DO WE HURT THE MOST, THE PARENT OR THE CHILDREN? I HAVE LONGED TO KNOW MY PARENT'S AND FAMILY.I WAS