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Bracelet Wars*

September 28, 2008 11:34 AM

It was meant as a sign of respect, but now conservatives are saying Sen. Barack Obama's invocation of his "hero bracelet" bearing the name of a fallen soldier is being done against the family's wishes, based on comments made months ago by the soldier's father.

Based on comments the mother of the family gave to the Associated Press today, however, the notion that Obama is wearing the hero bracelet against the wishes of the family -- or more specifically, the mother, who gave him the bracelet -- is more complicated that it first seemed. She did ask Obama to stop mentioning her son on the stump, but she approved of the way Obama invoked her son in the debate.

Some background:

During Friday night's presidential debate, Sen. John McCain, R-Ariz., mentioned the moment when the mother of a fallen soldier gave him a hero bracelet bearing her son's name, Matthew Stanley.

"I had a town hall meeting in Wolfeboro, New Hampshire, and a woman stood up and she said, 'Senator McCain, I want you to do me the honor of wearing a bracelet with my son's name on it.'" McCain recalled. "He was 22 years old and he was killed in combat outside of Baghdad, Matthew Stanley, before Christmas last year. This was last August, a year ago. And I said, 'I will -- I will wear his bracelet with honor.'...And then she said, 'But, Senator McCain, I want you to do everything -- promise me one thing, that you'll do everything in your power to make sure that my son's death was not in vain.'  That means that that mission succeeds, just like those young people who re-enlisted in Baghdad, just like the mother I met at the airport the other day whose son was killed. And they all say to me that we don't want defeat."

Stammering a bit as he appeared to be seeking the name on the bracelet on his wrist, Sen. Obama responded saying, "I've got a bracelet, too, from Sergeant, uh, from the mother of Sergeant Ryan David Jopek, given to me in Green Bay. She asked me, 'Can you please make sure another mother is not going through what I'm going through?' No U.S. soldier ever dies in vain because they're carrying out the missions of their commander in chief. And we honor all the service that they've provided. Our troops have performed brilliantly. The question is for the next president: 'Are we making good judgments about how to keep America safe? Precisely because sending our military into battle is such an enormous step."

**

In February, the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel reported on the moment when Tracy Jopek gave Obama the bracelet, and Obama's mentioning of Jopek after he won the Wisconsin primary.

"We're here because of the mother I met in Green Bay, Wisconsin, who gave me this bracelet that I'm wearing," Obama said then. "Inscribed on it is the name of her son Ryan. Next to his name it says...'All gave some but he gave all.' We are here because it is time to ask ourselves as a nation if we are serving Ryan and his compatriots and all our young brave men and women as well as they are serving us. They need us to end this war and bring them home and give them the care and the benefits that they deserve."

Ryan Jopek was 20, a member of the Wisconsin National Guard like his father. He deployed to Iraq in 2005, was killed there in 2006.

In February 2008, Ryan's mother Tracy and his sister Jessica traveled to Green Bay and waited in the cold for 45 minutes to give Obama her son's bracelet. A campaign staffer arranged it so they could meet him.

"I didn't get to say what I wanted to say. I just cried," Tracy Jopek told the newspaper. "It wasn't for anything but for him to know this is real, something he needed to know. . . I do believe (the war) needs to end, but I believe it needs to be done very carefully and very thoughtfully."

She said she was honored by Obama mentioning her son in his speech.

"I couldn't believe it. It was such an honor, such an honor," she said. "To know that he does know his name. It means a lot."

**

But a month later, Ryan's father Brian -- who is no longer married to Tracy -- told Wisconsin Public Radio that his ex-wife had misgivings about Obama wearing the bracelet and mentioning their son on the campaign trail. It seems as though just as Tracy Jopek supports Obama and wants to end the war, Brian Jopek has a different take on what should happen in Iraq and may be more inclined to support McCain.

(You can listen to Brian Jopek about 10 minutes into THIS CLIP.)

After pointing out that he and Tracy are not married anymore, Brian says that "from what I understood from email exchanges with Tracy….she wanted to put a name, she wanted Sen. Obama to know Ryan's name...She wasn't looking to turn it into a big media event...She just wanted it to be something between Barack Obama and herself."

Brian Jopek went on to say that "because of some of the negative feedback she’s gotten on the Internet, you know Internet blogs, you know people accusing her of… or accusing Obama of trying to get votes doing it… and that sort of thing, she has turned down any subsequent interviews with the media because she just didn’t, she just didn't want it to get turned into something that it wasn’t. She had told me that in an email that she had asked, actually asked Mr. Obama to not wear the bracelet anymore at any of his public appearances."

In an interview with the Associated Press today, Brian's ex-wife confirmed today that she had asked the Obama campaign to ask the candidate to stop mentioning her son on the stump.

But -- and here's where it gets complicated -- according to the AP story, Tracy Jopek also said she was "ecstatic" that Obama mentioned her son's hero bracelet during Friday's debate. That's because he was responding to McCain citing a different griveing mother's hero bracelet as a way to back his political views of the war in Iraq and citing the bracelet she'd given Obama was a good and appropriate way to remind people there are different views on this issue.

"His response in the debate was exactly that, a response, after John McCain put it out there first,” she said. “I think it was an appropriate response — he was just saying there’s another side to the story, there’s two different viewpoints.”

-- jpt

* This post was updated with the AP report on Tracy Jopek.

September 28, 2008 | Permalink | Share | User Comments (1049)

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John McCain has missed 420 votes (64.5%) during the current Congress.

Posted by: USCITIZEN_04 | Sep 29, 2008 6:26:04 PM

What is funny is McSame used that Bracelet as a back drop. He will use his Ammo to promote how he knows more about war, but when the Camera is off he votes no on all thing pertaining to our veterans.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008 - Since everyone is at least a bit familiar with John McCain’s record when it comes to strolling through a market in Baghdad with hundreds of his closest guards, or how he wants to stay in Iraq for 100 years (except when he flip flops on that).
But not that many really, truly know just how horrific his voting record is when it comes to the troops. And it is pretty consistent – whether it is for armor and equipment, for veteran’s health care, for adequate troop rest or anything that actually, you know, supports our troops.
This is chock full of links to the roll call votes, and the roll call votes have links to the actual underlying bills and amendments. I present this so that there is support and things that can be rattled off when saying that McCain is not a friend of the military. Feel free to use it as you want, but this can be tied into the "Double Talk Express". But here is a very quick statement - John McCain skipped close to a dozen votes on Iraq, and on at least another 10 occasions, he voted against arming and equipping the troops, providing adequate rest for the troops between deployments and for health care or other benefits for veterans.
In mid 2007, Senator Reid noted that McCain missed 10 of the past 14 votes on Iraq. However, here is a summary of a dozen votes (two that he missed and ten that he voted against) with respect to Iraq, funding for veterans or for troops, including equipment and armor. I have also included other snippets related to the time period when the vote occurred.
September 2007: McCain voted against the Webb amendment calling for adequate troop rest between deployments. At the time, nearly 65% of people polled in a CNN poll indicted that "things are going either moderately badly or very badly in Iraq.
July 2007: McCain voted against a plan to drawdown troop levels in Iraq. At the time, an ABC poll found that 63% thought the invasion was not worth it, and a CBS News poll found that 72% of respondents wanted troops out within 2 years.
March 2007: McCain was too busy to vote on a bill that would require the start of a drawdown in troop levels within 120 days with a goal of withdrawing nearly all combat troops within one year. Around this time, an NBC News poll found that 55% of respondents indicated that the US goal of achieving victory in Iraq is not possible. This number has not moved significantly since then.
February 2007: For such a strong supporter of the escalation, McCain didn’t even bother to show up and vote against a resolution condemning it. However, at the time a CNN poll found that only 16% of respondents wanted to send more troops to Iraq (that number has since declined to around 10%), while 60% said that some or all should be withdrawn. This number has since gone up to around 70%.
June 2006: McCain voted against a resolution that Bush start withdrawing troops but with no timeline to do so.
May 2006: McCain voted against an amendment that would provide $20 million to the Department of Veterans Affairs (VA) for health care facilities.
April 2006: McCain was one of only 13 Senators to vote against $430,000,000 for the Department of Veteran Affairs for Medical Services for outpatient care and treatment for veterans.
March 2006: McCain voted against increasing Veterans medical services funding by $1.5 billion in FY 2007 to be paid for by closing corporate tax loopholes.
March 2004: McCain once again voted for abusive tax loopholes over veterans when he voted against creating a reserve fund to allow for an increase in Veterans' medical care by $1.8 billion by eliminating abusive tax loopholes. Jeez, McCain really loves those tax loopholes for corporations, since he voted for them over our veterans' needs.
October 2003: McCain voted to table an amendment by Senator Dodd that called for an additional $322,000,000 for safety equipment for United States forces in Iraq and to reduce the amount provided for reconstruction in Iraq by $322,000,000.
April 2003: McCain urged other Senate members to table a vote (which never passed) to provide more than $1 billion for National Guard and Reserve equipment in Iraq related to a shortage of helmets, tents, bullet-proof inserts, and tactical vests.
August 2001: McCain voted against increasing the amount available for medical care for veterans by $650,000,000. To his credit, he also voted against the 2001 Bush tax cuts, which he now supports making permanent, despite the dire financial condition this country is in, and despite the fact that he indicated in 2001 that these tax cuts unfairly benefited the very wealthy at the expense of the middle class.
So there it is. John McCain is yet another republican former military veteran who likes to talk a big game when it comes to having the support of the military. Yet, time and time again, he has gone out of his way to vote against the needs of those who are serving in our military. If he can’t even see his way to actually doing what the troops want, or what the veterans need, and he doesn’t have the support of veterans, then how can he be a credible commander in chief?

Posted by: USCITIZEN_04 | Sep 29, 2008 6:23:25 PM

Someone said Obama would do anything for a vote? Wait a minute wasn't McShame the one who brought up the fallen soldier 1st?

Posted by: Bea | Sep 29, 2008 6:20:51 PM

Concerned in OH, slow down and re-read the story. It seems that mom did ask Obama not to use it for his stumps, which he did. But then you have McSame using it during the debates, when Obama used his to counter McSame's, the Mom was very proud, as this mom did not want other mothers to feel the pain she has at the loss of her child.

Posted by: USCITIZEN_04 | Sep 29, 2008 6:11:41 PM

You know conservatism is to conserve the goods in each and every one of us. Thinks most of these poor souls that had given their souls to devil have to get it back. I used to believe in a conservative idea but lately I started to wonder what are these airhead are trying to conserve. They against anything that has anything to do with common people. On deceiving yourselves

Posted by: Ocean11 | Sep 29, 2008 4:42:16 PM

Someone asked how to find the bill McCain co-sponsored in 2005 - I googled it.

S. 190 [109th]: Federal Housing Enterprise Regulatory Reform Act of 2005

Posted by: Anna | Sep 29, 2008 4:40:58 PM

It's amazing to me how many people on here glibly throw around the phrase "unjust war" as if it were an established or generally accepted fact. I have news for you, at least half of America doesn't agree with you. Stop going around assuming everyone agrees with you and Code Pink.

It just shows your ignorance and hubris.

Go back to the voting records of congress and see just how many of them voted to support the war in Iraq, and how many of them that now say they are against the war started by Bush, considered Saddam a real threat when Clinton was in office and were supportive of Clintons belligerent stance towards the regime of Saddam. Talk about hypocracy.

As far as the bracelet issue goes, that is and should be a private matter for the person that wears it. I spent 12 years in the Marines and have lost more friends in training mishaps than I have in combat. I know a lot of Marines that wear memory bracelets, and it is a personal choice, just like having a lapel pin with an American flag, or wearing a cross or other religious symbol around your neck. It doesn't make you more or less patriotic, or more or less supportive of the troops, it merely means you choose to display those symbols. What that symbol means to you is a personal matter, and you should never try and use it to justify your actions or prove you are "holier than thou" to an opponent. It cheapens the meaning of the symbol and the sacrifices made to give it that meaning.

The only relevance that any of this has in the campaign should be that we are in a state of war, and that we need a leader with both executive and military experience to guide us through this conflict. Obama has neither. McCain has both, it's as simple as that.

Posted by: Greg | Sep 29, 2008 4:18:34 PM

jdub297 - is this the best that right-wing extremists can do? Spread unsubstantianted lies? Stop spreading blog BS, nitwit

Posted by: nhmtnbkr | Sep 29, 2008 4:00:25 PM

I think most people are missing the point of the bracelet story. You will have family who think that their child/husband/wife died for the country and it is a great honor. You will have other people who think that their child/husband/wife, while server their country bravely died for an unjust war. The fact that McCain is pushing that this mother and other mothers are right about their kids dying and that they are proud to keep the fight going (by they are not wrong for feeling that way), it doesn't negate the fact that other military family are outrage and against the fact that kids are dying for an unjust war. Sound bites are good, but neither John or Obama can fully care about the issues of the soilders, because they are not picking them up in a body bag or taking them for rehab. I am not saying that both men are without feelings, I am saying that it hit home harder than it does the general public. So, for the mom who wants all the troops our that is fine and for the mom who want us to stay the course that is fine, as long as you don't make it a platform, because I am "right" for my views and you are wrong for your views and vice versa.
BTW: has anyone seen the stock market today? *nod nod wink wink* Let's get back to serious stuff and leave the bracelets on your wrists.

Posted by: Richard | Sep 29, 2008 3:22:46 PM

So the father lacks the guts and stones to stay married to the mother, but wants to disavow the mother's wishes? Typical Republican crap. This guy walks out on his family, but wants to stand up and refute Obama. Put a dress on this guy and send him to Iraq - gutless coward. We need more men in this country willing to stay married and less cowards wanting to take political shots at Godly men like Obama. Is this what the Republican party has become? The party of adulterers and divorcees? The party that can't keep commitments and sends our citizens to die without any forethought or commitment?


Posted by: Dave
=====================================
Boy, talk about judgemental! I am a woman and I was the one that ended my marriage and left. What right does anyone have to make such a statement? Blows my mind how evil and small minded some people are. The only comfort is... what goes around comes around! This guys wife (if he even has one) has every reason to walk out on him. He is purely hateful.

Posted by: Voting for McCain because of Palin | Sep 29, 2008 3:22:14 PM

i wonder where was macain bracelet? this moron macain brought up the subject and he was not wearing a bracelet. obama should have ask to see the bracelet

Posted by: ray | Sep 29, 2008 3:06:00 PM

"If McCain cared about soldiers killed in Iraq, why hasn't he fought Bush's policy of hiding the return of their coffins to America? Where has McCain been? He plays politics with a bracelet and stands silent as the cameras are barred from covering the dead.
Posted by: JTS | Sep"

Uh, this isn't a "Bush" policy but one of the military and the UCMJ. the military respects their dead and doesn't like to see them exploited. Early on in the war, a news photographer snuck a photo of some coffins being unloaded, against the express wishes and orders of the people responsible for them. THEY DON'T LIKE TO SEE THEIR SOLDIERS EXPLOITED, dead or alive. For you to ask to see every coffin departing every plane in order to make a point, well, you're wishing to exploit them as well. This is also why the military prefers to not have embedded reporters, not because they have something to hide but because it is counter to a. their mission and b. respect for a dead soldier and his/her family.

Posted by: Nancy | Sep 29, 2008 2:49:41 PM

Obama has little business making any comments about any fallen soldier, since he's never spent a day in uniform McCain has given a great deal of his life to the service of our nation, and has fought and survived one of the most brutal wars of the past century. He is the only one qualified to speak on behalf of anyone that has served and seen combat and sacrificed their health, limbs or their life. McCain is not my first choice for president (Fred Thompson would have been a better alternative), but compared to Obama, he's the only choice we have if we want to save America.

Posted by: Greg | Sep 29, 2008 2:41:24 PM

If McCain cared about soldiers killed in Iraq, why hasn't he fought Bush's policy of hiding the return of their coffins to America? Where has McCain been? He plays politics with a bracelet and stands silent as the cameras are barred from covering the dead.

Posted by: JTS | Sep 29, 2008 2:40:34 PM

Tim "The problem is that he didn't know the man's name."

Anyone who watched it could see he was stumbling over the phrasing, having started out by saying the soldier gave it to him (obviously the mother, not the dead soldier, gave it to him). If had had rehearsed it and expected to use it as as a set piece pander like McCain, I'm sure his delivery would have been more to your liking.

Posted by: jhw539 | Sep 29, 2008 2:23:02 PM

Two years ago, McCain never used to talk about his service believing it to be too sacred for political gain. But for most of this campaign, McCain has cheapened his own war sacrifice and those of others just get sympathy for his candidacy. Finally, Obama called him on it.

Posted by: Young Atheart | Sep 29, 2008 1:59:07 PM

The problem is that he didn't know the man's name. He had to look down at the bracelet. He's an idiot, and should quite pandering.

Posted by: Tim | Sep 29, 2008 1:50:25 PM

GoUSA247 do you live in the past? Have you forgotten that you had 6 years of Republican rule? So if this was all Bill's fault why have the Republicans not cleaned it up and just sat at the war drums, (Crap they even got that one wrong, can you say Afghanistan or Al Qaeda and Bin Laden?) Always good at pointing fingers, but not good at pointing out solutions. If you are at work (that is if your job has not been given to someone over seas or not hit under the growing unemployment rolls) and you see a problem do you just leave it? Or do you doing something proactive to correct the problem? This is GW Bush's presidency,. and the deregulation was all done way back when, but Bush had to undo Clinton's work. God forbid if the other guy was making a surplus for America and paying our national debit off so our children would not have to. Try living in the here now, and look at the future not the past. You need to watch the Lion king again, most kids under the age of 10 know you can not change the past, but you can change the future.

Posted by: USCITIZEN_04 | Sep 29, 2008 12:32:02 PM

Park writes. "A 2005 legislation doesn't make up for 26 years of deregulation by McCain." Yes, it all McCains fault. He alone among all the Senators and Representatives causes deregulation which causes this mess. Not! It is Democrats failed policies of pushing easy credit for those who should not own homes to own homes. If you are not able to pay for something you should not buy it. Deregulation is a good thing except when you have Washington liberals try to make the free market bend to their will messing with the how the free market works. McCain tried to do something about it but again he was only one man. At least he had the foresight to try to make real change, as he pushed for in Iraq. McCain has proven he is the candidate of real change as he has pushed for it and has caused it unlike the empty suit who is his opponent whose only real change is trying to change his job once he gets a new one.

Posted by: Minnesotaman | Sep 29, 2008 12:30:08 PM

Park, I actually enjoyed commenting with you. You are the only one on here that could state any valid arguments for your candidate, and I respect that. Haven't changed my opinion of him, and I still feel McCain is the better candidate. I need to gat out of here. The Loons are coming out of the wood work and I have some tings to do.

Later.

Posted by: Al-in-Indy | Sep 29, 2008 11:55:26 AM

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